You are three and a half, and today is the day I get to meet you for the first time. Today is the first day of a week long visit with your Dad and I.
I've been nervous for weeks. Today, I'm not nervous or anxious, but I am a flood of emotion since your dad left to get you.
I've known you since before you ever felt the sun on your face. Still, I don't know if you know me, or know of me, or who I am to your dad, to you. Maybe, that doesn't matter because you will know me soon.
It's funny, I have had instant love for you since I saw your newborn photo. You will always be the first thing I loved without knowing anything about you.
I knew that your Dad was my other half then. I knew no matter what happened between us romantically, that I would always know him & would always know you. From that moment forward, I loved you like you were my own child; you are just as much a part of me as your Dad is.
The circumstances are not ideal, and they have taught me patience, selflessness and perseverance. You are worth every sleepless night, every argument, every penny spent and every deep breath we took to keep the peace.
I am so overcome with joy, relief and excitement for this day. I'm so thankful to your mommy for allowing this visit.
Today is the day.
Today is just the first day and I can't wait.
Always.
-Stephanie
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